Maybe that’s why

Maybe that’s why

I almost got into the studio to record 4 of my tracks with 4 talented musos (that I’d have loved to have had on my next album). Sadly that didn’t eventuate due to conflicting commitments at the time. And as much as that really sucked, I knew then as I know now, there is always a reason. So I didn’t fight it.

Fast forward to several weeks ago when I started working with new mentor Rae Howell. Some things have come up in that time that have made me wonder if this is why those songs, and that album, were not recorded…

When a recent failed attempt to work on said album was dominated by down-time, thanks to the flu, I was experiencing some intense self-reflection. I was vulnerable and I got sick (it usually happens that way). So instead of isolating myself to work on my existing songs (which is what I thought I wanted) I found myself bursting with emotion and needing to write new material instead.

There’s nothing astounding about this. But when I came to talk it through with Rae, I realised that maybe I haven’t recorded yet because it wasn’t the album I wanted to release. I’m not done creating it.

Fyerfly with new mentor and piano extraordinaire, Rae Howell

Fyerfly with Rae Howell

I had been putting pressure on myself to get the next one out because you’re all waiting. I was waiting. But Rae helped me to let that go, which has helped me to settle back into the space of creation – where the magic really happens for artists. And what had been missing for me.

So instead of the finished songs I thought would be on the album, I have unfinished songs that need time to develop. Some stuff I started years ago, some is still falling out of me now.

And if I continue in this direction, my sophomore album will be a darker vibe than I had originally intended, and later to release, but I know it will be deeply authentic, and worthy of my investment.

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